Why is it tradition to shake hands?

Why is it tradition to shake hands? Trust and transparency

Understanding why is it tradition to shake hands helps people navigate social interactions with confidence and respect. This common greeting serves as a foundational tool for building professional relationships and establishing immediate trust. Learning the deeper meanings behind physical greetings prevents social awkwardness and ensures you make a positive first impression in any setting.

The Ancient Origins of the Handshake: A Gesture of Survival

Shaking hands is a tradition rooted in thousands of years of human history, appearing as early as the 9th century BC in Assyrian art. At its core, the gesture can be understood as a display of peace and transparency, signaling to another person that you are unarmed and mean no harm. By extending the right hand - the hand typically used to wield a sword or dagger - individuals proved they were not concealing a weapon, fostering a fragile sense of security in a dangerous world and explaining the early origin of shaking hands.

Over time, what began as a practical safety signal gradually evolved into a common social greeting. In modern society, the gesture rarely serves to prove someone is unarmed, yet the physical contact still carries psychological weight. Studies show that people often form strong first impressions based on the firmness and confidence of a handshake.^[3] What once functioned as a basic security check has transformed into a subtle signal of confidence, openness, and trustworthiness, raising the question of what does a handshake symbolize in modern interactions.

From Ancient Greece to the Roman Empire: Sealing the Deal

While the Assyrians provided the earliest record, it was the ancient Greeks who popularized the dexiosis, or the joining of right hands, to signify friendship and trust. Funerary steles from the 5th century BC frequently depict soldiers or spouses shaking hands, representing a bond that even death could not break. For the Greeks, the handshake was less about safety and more about the sacredness of a covenant - a physical manifestation of a verbal promise that helped shape the early history of the handshake.

The Romans took this a step further, using the handshake to formalize legal agreements and military alliances. It was not just a greeting; it was a contract. Ive often thought about how different our business world would be if we still viewed a handshake as a life-or-death oath. In modern negotiations, researchers have found that a handshake can foster trust in a conversation.^[4] The physical touch releases oxytocin - sometimes called the trust hormone - which naturally lowers social barriers. It bridges the gap between two strangers by establishing a tactile common ground and helps explain why is it tradition to shake hands even today.

Why is it Tradition to Shake Hands in Medieval Times?

Remember that question about why we shake instead of just holding? The answer lies in the messy reality of the Middle Ages. During this era, the handshake served a very practical, almost violent function. Knights and soldiers would grip each others hands and shake them vigorously. The goal was to dislodge any daggers or small blades that might be hidden up the sleeve of an opponent. If you felt a piece of steel slide down against your palm, the greeting ended abruptly.

Many elements of modern etiquette originate from practical concerns of earlier eras. In the case of the handshake, the action reflected a balance between trust and caution in societies where personal safety could not be taken for granted. Over time, the gesture persisted even after the original risks disappeared, illustrating how customs rooted in survival gradually become symbols of politeness and social trust, prompting historians to ask when did shaking hands begin as a universal greeting.

The Quaker Influence: Equality in the Palm of Your Hand

By the 17th century, the handshake underwent a radical social transformation thanks to the Religious Society of Friends, commonly known as Quakers. Before this period, greetings were often hierarchical. You might bow to a superior, tip your hat to an equal, or expect a peasant to kneel. Quakers viewed these gestures as symbols of class division and vanity. They sought a greeting that emphasized equality among all people, regardless of status.

They chose the handshake because it was a horizontal gesture. Neither person is above the other; both are on the same level. This shift turned the handshake from a safety check into a political statement of egalitarianism. Ive found that this is why the handshake feels so uniquely democratic compared to other greetings. It is the only physical interaction that demands both parties be active participants at the same height. Interestingly, as this custom spread, it replaced more elaborate courtly gestures, eventually becoming the standard for the burgeoning merchant class who valued efficiency and fair dealing over noble titles.

The Modern Psychology: Why We Still Do It

Even in the digital age, the handshake persists because our brains are wired for physical connection. A study of neural responses shows that a handshake activates the same brain regions associated with reward processing. When we touch another persons palm, our brains register that person as more approachable and less threatening. This is particularly critical in high-stakes environments like international diplomacy or high-value sales and even shapes handshake meaning in different cultures around the world.

However, there is a modern debate about whether the tradition should continue given health concerns. Lets look at the numbers: A handshake transfers about 2 times as many bacteria as a high-five and about 20 times as many as a fist bump.^[5] Despite this, the handshakes psychological benefits often outweigh the hygiene risks for many. In a world where so much of our interaction is filtered through glass screens, the simple, skin-to-skin contact of a handshake remains the most effective way to say, I see you, and I trust you—and it helps explain why is it tradition to shake hands.

Handshake vs. Other Global Greetings

The Handshake

• Horizontal - emphasizes that both parties are equal
• Equality, trust, and the sealing of an agreement
• High - direct skin-to-skin palm contact
• Highest - transfers significantly more microbes than non-contact greetings

The Bow (Japan/Korea)

• Vertical - depth of bow often signals relative social standing
• Respect, humility, and acknowledgement of status
• Zero - no physical touch involved
• Negligible - extremely hygienic

The Fist Bump (Modern/Casual)

• Egalitarian - very informal and neutral
• Camaraderie, informal agreement, and modern coolness
• Low - limited surface area contact
• Lowest - reduces germ transfer by about 90% compared to a handshake ^[6]

Alex's First Big Interview: The 'Limp Fish' Lesson

Alex, a 22-year-old recent graduate in London, walked into his first corporate interview at a major marketing firm. He was academically brilliant but terrified of sounding arrogant, so he tried to be as gentle as possible during the introductions.

When the lead partner extended her hand, Alex gave what he thought was a polite, light touch. His hand was slightly sweaty from nerves, and he didn't apply any pressure. The result? A 'limp fish' handshake that felt slippery and hesitant.

The interview felt cold from that moment on. Alex realized his 'politeness' was being read as a lack of confidence or social awareness. He decided to practice a firm - but not bone-crushing - grip with a friend, focusing on making full palm-to-palm contact.

In his next interview, Alex delivered a steady, dry handshake with two confident pumps. The interviewer's posture visibly relaxed, and Alex reported feeling a surge of control. He landed the job and learned that a handshake isn't just a greeting; it's a silent CV.